Monday 18th September 2017 is the date that’s been in my mind and diary for the last five months. It’s the day you start school.
Funnily enough, the 18th September 2012 was your due date. Five years on and the date remains an important day in my calendar.
Five years ago (well almost, you’re just two days away from being 5) you come bounding into the World. You never think then how fast the next few years will go of being at home together – you just assume it’s years away and it’ll take forever to get there and you just take in for granted those days spent together will last forever. I know people say it all the time and it’s such a cliche but they have honestly whizzed by so quickly I can’t quite understand where they’ve gone. You’ve gone from our little newborn to a happy smiley baby onto a very energetic toddler who liked to climb everything. You would climb onto my windowsills after searching out a box to push over to sit under the window to help you up, you would climb on your little Ikea kitchen (and I’m talking about being just a year old!) you would grab hold of both handles on the French doors and use your feet to climb up the doors … the list was endless. You gave us a fair few frights seeing what you were getting up to.
You started pre-school in January 2016 and right from the start you absolutely loved it. I never had any problems dropping you off and you always had such fun coming out at the end of the afternoon with a smile. You would hold my hand and you would skip along next to me chatting about your afternoon, what you had played with, who you had played with and what snack you had
When you finished pre-school in July I knew that we had 8 whole weeks together. I planned on doing as many fun things as we could as well as doing what you like best …. spending the whole day at home without even getting dressed.
I thought those 8 weeks would last forever .. silly I know but I did think it would, but alas here I am sat here writing this at the end of those 8 weeks, your uniform is all washed, ironed and labeled and sat ready for you to put it on in the morning.
I’ve had the best (almost) 5 years. We’ve done so much together. From toddler groups to music classes with Heather, we’ve met with friends for play dates, we have gone to soft play, parks, the beach, we’ve gone swimming, we’ve met up with your Auntie & Cousin every week to go on a new adventure. We’ve gone to adventure parks, farms, Country Parks …. you name it we’ve done it. We’ve certainly made the most of our days out during term time because I know from now on we’ll have to do all of these things on school holidays, weekends and the odd inset day. The best decision I made was to get us both annual season tickets for your favorite place ever ….. Paultons Park, I wanted to get them so we could experience going whilst everyone was at school and make the most of the park and the rides being quiet. I think since May we’ve been practically every week and you’ve ever got bored of going. I’ve loved our days there together and although we can still go for years to come there really was something quite special about going whilst everyone was at school and work. I think you must have been their biggest “summer beach party” fan!
You’ve given me a new lease of confidence, I’ve done so much with you beside my side and you’ve been my buddy. I’m sure going to miss you so much during the day and I’ve been dreading ‘handing’ you over to someone else to be with them during the days. You’re mine and I don’t want to share you. I want to know what you’ve been doing without having to find out snippets when you remember to tell me. Thinking about you starting at times has made me hurt really bad inside, my heart has ached at the thought of this new journey starting and some nights (a good few nights) I’ve gone off to sleep thinking about it with tears pricking the back of my eyes.
You’ve not really expressed much about going to school because I think it’s been mentioned so much you’ve almost given up waiting …. but now you’ve known for a few days the big day is almost here you’re starting to get excited and chatting about going with your best friend in the entire world.
I don’t know how I’ll feel tomorrow stood there gripping your little hands tightly but not too tight it hurts, my heart beating and dreading the time it comes to let go … let you go off on this new journey and let you off into the real world on your own two little feet. This is the start of your education, the start of you beginning to learn the world around you more than you do now, to learn how to read and write and make new friends. I know you’re going to absolutely love being at school … well, I hope you do and I hope you love it as much as pre-school. I know once we’re into a routine of being at school it’ll seem like second nature to me (well us), but I do know that at the end of every school day I’ll be there stood waiting to see your little face, to grab your hand and walk off together listening to your tales from your day. I will look forward to the weekends and school holidays as we shall make the most of those days.
From my squishy newborn to a toddler, to a pre-schooler to my big primary school boy. It’s been a blast and although I don’t want to do it again with another I would love to go through it all again with you. If only we can rewind the clock eh?
Always stand up for yourself and don’t let anyone bring you down. Be strong, be kind. But above all just be you. You’re an amazing, funny, caring little thing and big school is very lucky to be having you.
As much as I don’t want this to happen I am really looking forward to watching you in your future nativities and sports days and seeing the new friends you make.
Good Luck on your first-day sweetheart. I’ll miss you lots but I know you’ll be mine again at the end of the school day.
Lots of love always Mummy xxx